so im lookin and thinkin of my next few tattoos...
i want something really me and cryptic and kinda tradional but kinda not.
something with maybe a bird and some ribbon things and loads of importance.
something that follows what all my others mean:
loyalty.

ive been in my head so much in the last few days if not ages and i think im ok now.
i think ive sorted some things and come to realise some others.
its such a good feeling.
ive always enjoyed being alone, never really had a problem with it if it was of my own free will.
but like everyone, i suffer from super bad loneliness.
but it's ok, once i can remember my end goal, im ok.
and that end goal isnt so hairy-scary anymore.
it's the waiting thats more likely to kill me.

i just wish somethings couldve been easier or just plain better.
and i wish that having to say goodbye to the important people never has to happen,
because that's the part that i dread the most.
the goodbye.
im going to miss the important people and it's gonna rip my heart out.

(image credit to: colin blakey and www.20x200.com www.myloveforyou.typepad.com)

sometimes i wish we never happened and then i could have a you free life.
and it starts to get that way and im blissful.
then you go and send a bitchy text like that, right out of the blue
and fuck my dream up.
just get out of my life ok, it's getting annoying now.

so the other day me and L went and tried to get some culture.

it kinda worked.
and i did get a much over-due haircut.
(thanks!)

so my head feels like there's an earthquake inside.
i feel like i am going to puke.
i am going home now.

so i made a new blog today. just one that, for me, clears out the cupboards.
and letting the dust settle and all that.

i feel weird but good.